Breathe In, Breathe Out. You're Fine!

Early in July 2007 I applied for a Thai driving license. Never in a zillion years would I ever consider driving here, but you need one to be eligible for an international license which I wanted in order to rent a car in California (where I went in January).

Of course only at the very end of the insanely arduous and hilarious multi-visit process did I discover that all I'd earned myself was a one-year temporary Thai permit which didn't make me eligible for an international license. Fortunately there's often a back door procedure for doing things in Thailand, and I ultimately obtained one from a different source. Since nobody at the San Francisco Airport branch of Avis read Thai they accepted my gobbledygook temporary permit and "ahem" international license and cheerfully rented me a car for a month.

Just before the temporary Thai permit expired a couple of weeks ago, I returned to the chaotic Bangkok version of the California DMV only to learn that I couldn't apply for anything permanent until AFTER the permit expired While I now have a year (!!!!) to trade it in for the five-year model, I really wanted to put this ongoing process behind me. To do so I need copies of every document vaguely relating to my existence in Thailand plus a health certificate.

Now I could present myself at to one of the many western-style Bangkok hospitals where for around 500 baht and a cursory exam by whichever doctor happened to be on call, I'd end up with the requisite certificate. OR, as happened this morning, I could stop in at an anonymous neighborhood clinic where the doctor's most pressing concern was deciphering my passport so she could correctly fill out her form. GAMPELL is my not my first name, I told her helpfully.

Having completed her primary task, the doctor took out a stethoscope and asked me to turn away from her. She put the scope on my back, had me breathe in and out three times and sent me back out to the waiting room. Two minutes and 80 baht later, I had my certificate of healthiness and was back out in the This Could Only Happen in Thailand world!